Idiots who couldn't get in!!!!

The adventures of fat and thin and we just couldn't get in!

(Shit the beep)

We went to Orchard, a crowded busy spot in the heart of Singapore. Not exactly the place we would like to go...we're not really into...yes, SHOPPING!

To clarify some things, Thin and I never shop when we go out together. Our hang out spots consist of three locations, The book store, the Libary or if we're feeling extremely adventurous, yes the whole of Singapore.

To prove my point, have you heard of CHIJ St Theresa, well, we have walked from there all the way to Bugis, the distance, more than a whooping 8 kilometers. Then of course I had to take the train back home. We did it in 3 hours by the way, if our parents found out about this, we'll be screwed so bad we won't know what hit our ***.

Ok, now on to the main reason why we are here. Yes, we went to Orchard to preview the Soong's sister house and to see if we can enter it through more normal means. So we went there and found that the main gate has been replaced with a new hardy looking gate. Of course, there were warning warning us not to enter. Thin and I wanted to climb over but it was broad daylight and we weren't in the mood of staying in a jail over night.

So we decided to circle around the condominuims that surround it and access it through the back gate. We walked...and walked...and walked...got lost, walked, access creepy alley, dead end, walked, got lost, cimbed awesome staircase located near drain; dead end, walked some more, walked a little bit more, manage to enter some old terrace house which looked yes incredibly awesome, walk a little bit more and more and well more until we have no idea where we were.

Just when Thin and I were about to lose all hope about finding the back gate. I spotted something, yes, the back part of the Soong's sisters house. However, the only way to access it was too tresspass into a condominium, climb 2 meters long green fence, fall into the Soong's sisters house at the height of about 3 meters. Were we willing to do that?

Well yes, what were you expecting. I inched foward and managed to slip pass the guard house, Thin followed me and we approach the green fence. After being scratch by a despicable thorn bush...(again with the thorns -_-) we manage to TOUCH the green fence.

Did we manage to climb it...no, why? Well because some bastard decided to alert the sercurity guard and we just got the hell out of there.

After all the trouble and all the shit we went through, Thin and I decided to give up for the day...thus this long essay above would explain to you why our trip to the Soong's Sister house would be delayed.

Would we try to enter again, YOU BETCHA, we're not that easily beaten.

If we have to order a helicopter and parachute our way in then WE WILL DO IT.

Anything is possible, failure is not acceptable, Obama has a phrase that describes this motto in three simple words: YES WE CAN!!!

and you betcha...we'll do it (once we raise 1000 dollars to get our butt out of jail)

Alkaff Mansion (and idiots)

The adventures of Fat and Thin and...well Alkaff( al-cafe) Mansion

coffee anyone?

Alkaff Mansion, a mansion long forgotten by the people of Singapore. Sitting tucked right in the middle of Telok Blangah Hill, it lays hidden underneath tons of thorny bushes. The only reason it was discovered (by Thin and me) was because of its highly beautiful master piece...the roof.

Now, seeing the picture above you may ask us, "Now what is so beautiful about this run down BRITISH COLONIAL STYLED building built in the 19TH CENTURY by the ALKAFF FAMILY who came from Indonesia?"

Did I explain enough?No?
Ok, ok for the benefit of the people who use their eyes instead of their minds, here's a picture of it in its prime.

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British Colonial Styled house: *nods*

Beautiful Grand fountain: *nods*

Golden old fashion lights for a romantic evening: *nods*

Alfresco dining: *nods*

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I dare you people to say your house is better looking than this house.

So now that I have convinced you that it was once that beautiful, you might now ask, how did THAT, turn into a run down abandoned place that could possibly be haunted.

History of the place:

-Man who owned the place: (Alkaff obviously you might say, but no his name goes like this)
Shaik Bin Abdul Rahman...then you insert an Alkaff somewhere.

-When was it built : 1852

-What was it use for: Tea parties and believe me the place is the kinda place you wanna hold tea parties at. Alice in Wonderland Setting anyone?

-From the 1980s to 2004, it was a restaurant after which it was abandoned.

Urban legends:

Apparently Alkaff used to be a restaurant in the 1980's in which there was an outdoor garden that allowed for couples to take a stroll after dinner. There is a rumor that a lady had seen (in her own words) "a very fast dash of white cloth" whom she claimed was a Pontianak. Before that, the lady had actually been warned by the security guard to "not take photos in this place because the owner would be very angry".The lady didn't heed his advice and did it. Is there a link? Did the owner know something about the place but more importantly, what was he trying to hide?

The credibility of this story cannot be verified but yes, that is one of the urban legend of the place. There's another story about a gray woman who resides in that area but again, the story cannot be verified.

To go straight to the point, the place is very beautiful and definitely not creepy at all if you visit it in the day. I highly suggest you don't visit it at night, not because of "clothy" ghosts that comes not only in the color white but in the color gray, but because of the thorns around the area and the decomposing steps.

The thorns are huge and the steps well, let's just say if you slip you would become the gray lady, and for boys, the gray transexual...wahahahaha
Is that place haunted? That reminds debatable but if you happen to see a "very fast dash of white cloth", it's probably your imagination or a very fast bunny or...just possibly...a very lovely white piece of curtain.









----> this equals that, highly likely :D

Getting there:


View My Saved Places in a larger map


1. From Harbour Front MRT Station, head north on Harbour Front Walk toward Telok Blangah Hill.
2.Take the first left on to Telok Blangah Road
3.Turn right at Henderson Road
4.Slight left at Telok Blangah Green (Destination will be on the right)
Credits: Google Maps

Now with all this said and with this much information given to you, what is stopping you from visiting this almost perfect place? Mosquitoes? The sun? The government? Fear?Well,these reasons are bogus, there is nothing that can stop you from visiting a place like this. The view is awesome, it's very accessible and extremely picturesque.

Ratings
Tiring level: 3
Worth it: 5
Safe: 3 (because of the thorns and steps)
Possibility of getting arrested: 4 (highly likely)
Haunted: 1 (a flash of white...panties...pfft)
Possibility of it remaining abandoned: 0 (it's going to get renovated so folks, what are you waiting for)

So yeah, that's that, we look forward to our next adventure (the Soong Sister's house)and remember if it's not occupied, its probably abandoned...and haunted :D

The idiots and the 3 places

If you people have been paying attention to the link, you would notice how long it is and probably curse it. I don't blame you, after all if you have a small mind, reading words so closely squeezed together wouldn't be too good for your brain either.

21 missions, 12 hours 2012 is probably the most innovative thing Fat and Thin have ever come up with. Notice that it is also the date for the end of the world. Why choose such a date, you may ask. Let's just say, if the world really ended then, this blog would be our contribution to the already half insane world.

So enough babbling and on with life.

Here are the first 3 places we're going to make a trip to.

1. Alkaff Mansion ( supposedly haunted) middle pic
2. Soong's Sisters House ( Haunted) left pic
3. Kranji War Memorial Cemetery ( peaceful...and haunted) right pic

Oh yeah did I mention that these places are all wonderful places, but yep, don't go there alone unless you wanna murder someone, you are the murderer's victim or...yes, you are a ghost.

That is all for today and remember if it's empty its abandoned...and haunted :D

Introduction (and idiots)

Welcome to this blog! If you're here, you're probably looking for abandoned places in Singapore or you just have no life. Admit it, half of us here on the Internet have no life which is why we're drawn to abandoned places, haunted spots and cemeteries in the first place.

Purpose

This blog was started to record our adventures to mysterious and abandoned places in Singapore. We have 21 missions and our date line-yes you guessed it- is the day the world ends. So if you're interested, join us and have an adventure in your own room while we, Fat and Thin, do all the hard work of trekking, cycling, walking, getting lost and lifting heavy cameras...or in certain cases, getting arrested. There is always that risk.

Get to know the 2 idiots
Fat- A typical idiot who resides on a tiny island called Singapore. The latter is a female, not a male. If you mistake her for a male, your tiny face would be pulverized into tiny little pieces (pls your face is already tiny enough, you don't need to make it even tinier). Yes, she lives in A plot of land and goes to B plot of school. She is 17 years old. Loves photography and the paranormal unknown. You can say she's an expert in anything haunted, try testing her knowledge with fake stories and photography and you'll be killed immediately :D

Thin- A typical reclusive idiot who resides in midair. She calls herself a martian and refuses to have any sort of link with the human race. She believes that she is here for a purpose but she has yet to find what that purpose is. She loves her stuffed animals and claims they are alive and have feelings. When she is not wasting time writing about herself, she can be seen talking to the swans in Botanic Garden, the lizards in the Armenian Church, or the cats in Mount Sophia.

Join us!
We are two teenagers who are sick of shopping malls and urban life. We're here to bring you the other side of Singapore, places that you would not typically go to, places that are haunted by past colonials and WW2. So be prepared for pictures, long essays and yes, the adventures of Fat and Thin (brought to you by Cathay Cinema 17 December 2010)

-Written by Fat and Edited by Thin